JUPITAR ASCENDING -2015
- Leigh Hughes
- Feb 25, 2015
- 4 min read

I sometimes wonder if the hype that surrounds a film is what does it the most damage especially in its first few weeks of release. Then I also wonder is there so much hype being made because the fear of failure lingers so they believe the more they say in a positive the better the reception of the film will be. Having such big names as The Wachowskis well known for their “Matrix” trilogy and one of my personal all-time favourite films “Cloud Atlas” writing and directing a film can only be a beautiful thing, you would think anyway…

Jupiter Jones begins to tell us in narrative the way her parents first met and his unfortunate death while her mother was carrying her, these days Jupiter is the single, still living with her mother and other relatives, no love for life, feeling worthless cleaner for the rich who has no real aspirations in life other than being aware she was always meant for more. In another part of the Universe the siblings of the most powerful family in the Universe House of Abrasax; Balem, Kalique and Titus fight over their Matriarch’s inheritance. On Earth Jupiter has agreed to sell her eggs and give more than half the money to her cousin, whilst in the operating room Jupiter is attacked by keepers (alien hunters) who have been sent by Balem to kill her. Caine an alien tracker Lycian who is half human and half canine has been hired by Titus and ends up saving Jupiter form the keepers. He agrees to help Jupiter which goes against his orders set out by Titus eventually taking her to the capital city of the Universe where Jupiter learns the truth as to why she is so important and why she is wanted dead…

(I found this plot to be the hardest thing to write and did my very best to not spoil anything for those who are yet to see it. There is so much more to what happens but being true to my word I will never spoiler a film by giving away key moments, even if it means you are left with what could be a point form synopsis.)
What a film was my initial thought once the credits at the end of the film started to roll, I still had hundreds of unanswered questions which I found quite frustrating, the film remain on my mind for the next few days as I came up with ideas and answers all it would turn out, worthless. So in saying that I wasn’t thinking of this film in a positive light in fact I was extremely disappointed with so much but first here’s what I loved. The imagination of this film is insane, the worlds created, the alien races brought to life, the sheer scale of the landscapes and cities everything was amazing. The cities designed each with their own theme was overwhelming to say the least I was amazed by the creativity that was unleashed unfortunately that was where it ended. Everything else was below par in every possible way, the characters were so passé they were never entertaining, never had anything fun to say, it seemed Jupiter was more in the film for comic relief (poorly executed I must say). The script was poor, the story was so confusing and absolutely full of very obvious plot holes it actually got annoying, if there was a lull moment in the film your mind began to wonder as did the fellow cinema goers as you heard fidgeting and readjusting going on all around during the slower moments. The action sequences are what annoyed me most though, the camera work was pathetic, I have no idea why directors continue to use hand held fast moving cameras during action sequences yet they do. Seeing a blur of mess on the screen as two alien spacecraft destroy Chicago is a joke, you are more than aware of what is happening but for some reason the directors have decided we really don’t need to see it. So annoying! The score is nice but again nothing too spectacular it definitely has its moments but if you have seen another film from the 70’s you will hear something very familiar.

Jupiter Ascending stars Mila Kunis (Black Swan, Family Guy) as Jupiter Jones, Channing Tatum (21 Jump Street, Magic Mike) as Caine Wise, Sean Bean (Lord of the Rings, Game of Thrones) Stinger Apini, Eddie Redmayne (The Theory of Everything, Les Miserables) as Balem Abrasax, Tuppence Middleton (The Imitation Game, Trance) as Kalique Abrasax and Douglas Booth (Noah, The Riot Club) as Titus Abrasax. Personally I feel the wrong cast was chosen no-one in the film did anything for me, no one moved me or made me love them, in fact I’d go as far as saying they were all boring including Mila Kunis who I absolute adore usually. This film missed the mark in so many places it was totally disappointing especially since finding out all the stunts were actually performed by the actors; if only we could actually see them!!! It would have made a world of difference I’m sure.

I loved the idea behind the film and I would actually love to have seen this film be as good as it promised it would be, I’m sad to say it’s not. It is entertaining enough to keep you captivated, you will definitely laugh and I have no doubt you will love the worlds and the idea of how they exist, so I’m not saying skip this film altogether I think more I want you to be prepared to be disappointed, so that when you do see it, your expectations will be so low that you will love what you see instead and wonder why I decided to ingest downers before heading to my seat. One last thing I would recommend though is to forget seeing this at the cinema, with so much happening on the screens at once the big screens made it so hard to follow, wait for the dvd and see it at home in the comfort of your home where you can see everything. It is family friendly not that the kids will understand what is going on, so be prepared for a few possibly unanswerable questions after.

Jupiter Ascending – 2.5 out of 5 BanShee Screams.

Thanks for reading.
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